May 19, 2009

"Roads to Stalinism" by Conservative Guest Blogger Nate Fortuson

Hello Readers of Zach + Kimya,

I recenty read Zach's friday reccomendations entitled, "My Bagel Tastes Like Capitalism", and was outraged by the liberal/socialist bias that was inherent. It is so like the liberals to hash out these weekly reccomendations, telling us what we're supposed to like and then denouncing capitalism. Oh, waah, I don't like capitalism because I can't make a wage by smoking pot and wearing a beret in a coffee shop. Grow up and get a job that doesn't involve meter and verse. If these whiney liberals manned up spent as much time working at jobs they hated like the rest of us they'd realize that capitalism is the only way to do things.Even Kimya shows her liberal bias in her love of things French? You know what the French hate? American Freedom and capitalsim.Barack Obama and his team of lefty-lacky followers who cling to every word he says seem to not understand this, mostly because they don't have jobs. Any of them. And none of them ever did. Ever.

There is this new ideal that making everything public is the the way to go. This tragic left ideal switch to become more like Europe is tragic. These leftist countries are far worse places to live than America. Canada has communist care, that's what socialized helathcare is. Supposedly it's soooo much better, if you listen to the liberal media. But get this:

2009 Canadian Population Estimate: 33,653,000
2009 US Population Estimate: 306,447,000
(Source: Wikipedia)

Look at the US! USA USA USA! We're so far ahead in of them it's not even funny. Guess that socialized healthcare is really working out for you, you're making plenty of babies... oh wait, no you're not because you're communists.

Oh wait, but that's only one instance. Let's look at the others. It's not like there's other cases where we are beating them. Oh wait yes there is, because we have a higher average temperature in our country and more farmland.

And look how well we're doing in Science...

Science is like golf, you want a low score. You've always wanted a low score, until these European liberals came around and tried to change everything. Liberals are just trying to take us away from our values that God gave us.

And that's another thing that the liberals want to take from us: God. God created the world, then told the Jews all the things that he thought were good, then they passed down what happened for generations, then a guy named Jesus who was the Son of God was born, and people started following him and telling stories of him until eventually someone wrote them down and they were used to found America. And that's the was remembered, until the liberals started putting their dirty hands in it.

I believe if you let liberals decide history, they will start deciding what is right and wrong. For instance, most Americans are against gay marriage. There's polls, trust me, look them up. But these liberals decide that just because their opinions are "more inclusive", they get judges to decide that we should follow their opinions. It's absurd. Why do these government liberals get to change our country into Europe. Many of you may be saying, "Well, really our Democrats are the conservatives of Europe, so we don't really even have an idea European liberalism." Well I do: Barack Obama.

Face the facts: Obama likes taxes, so do the European liberals. Obama likes to take businesses and put them under control of the government. I've heard Obama even MADE the economy crash, just because he loves putting the government in businesses. It's true. Look it up.

Some people think taking things like the Auto Industry putting the government in it is better because it makes it public instead of private. They are wrong, and have never used a public bathroom. Business is better off private, keep the government out of it. You know who else likes to take private things and make them public? Flashers.

Pictured: Barack Obama?

Buying the Auto Industry is just Obama trying to monopolize everything we love. If he's in control of all our cars, what happens when he's in charge of all the roads? Oh wait, he is. He took the roads over without us looking, and is now looking at spending $28 billion in highway construction. Who gave him such authority? Not me. I believe in a free market road system. It is the people who should have choice of where the roads go, we create them as we drive to our favorite capitalistic businesses. That way, the best businesses have the best roads to get their, and the rich people can pay to pave their streets, but they deserve it because they earned their money. If we let the government decide where our roads are, what's next? Are they going to make me marry gay, or believe in evolution? Don't buy into the socialism.

Pictured: Real American.

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