June 12, 2010

World Cup Predictions Part 2

So there were two ties yesterday, which can hardly tell me how right or wrong I was with my picks, but Greece got beat 2-0 to South Korea yesterday, which I'm gonna go ahead and say proves me to be right. Also, Argentina is winning right now, so I may have got Group B right entirely.

Also, I'm tired of alternating between calling it football and soccer, so I'm going to stick to futbol, because I like compromising.

Group E
Netherlands
Denmark
Japan
Cameroon


Seeing as I lived there for a semester and I saw the futbol team beat the Americans, I have to root for my second home, the Netherlands. Also, I heard somewhere that they are going to be good, so I'm excited for that.

Denmark has a long standing tradition of Lego futbol games, so they may have some practice but they may get tired of trying to build the team halfway through and just switch to making a rocket ship or something.

Japan and Cameroon can't win because I've already picked token representation from Africa and Asia, so that's that. Call me racist (or continentist), but South Americans and Europeans are the best at futbol. Asia and Africa still beat the rest of the world in math and..erm... having diamonds?

However, upon like ten minutes of research I find that Cameroon is actually pretty good. So yeah, they can beat Denmark, who are probably too anarchist to care about futbol.

Projected Group Rank
Netherlands
Cameroon
Denmark
Japan

Group F
Italy
Paraguay
New Zealand
Slovakia


Italy wins this group. I don't think that requires explaining

Paraguay will also make it to the next round avenging the loss of their sister Uruguay. Can countries be sisters just because they have the same ending? I just assume all the -stans and -lands are.

New Zealand doesn't have much of a chance, I'm pretty sure their team is made up entirely of sheep and Lord of the Rings extras.

Slovakia should just be glad that they got here and the Czech Republic didn't. At least they know they got the good soccer players in the divorce settlement.

Projected Group Rank
Italy
Paraguay
Slovakia
New Zealand

Group G
Brazil
North Korea
Ivory Coast
Portugal


Brazil is the Italy of South America. A team that I can always expect to do really really well.

I wasn't aware that North Koreans were allowed to compete in the world cup. I mean, maybe they qualified, but isn't there a nicer country that we could allow in? I expected them to be dicks and not come in last.

Ivory Coast is a team that seems like they could use a win. But I expect them to not even be able to beat North Korea, because the world is spiteful like that.

Portugal has got to take the second spot here, simply because they are Brazil-like of all the other teams. Basically, whether or not you will win in the world cup is dependent on how Brazil-like you are.

Projected Group Rank:
Brazil
Portugal
North Korea
Ivory Coast

Group H:
Spain
Switzerland
Honduras
Chile


Okay, its the last group for today, so let me keep this brief.
Spain is good.
Switzerland is neutral.
Honduras is poor.
Chile is South American.

You can probably figure out that rank on your own.

Be back next time and I might talk about the knockout round.

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